Casting the Godfather Prequel

A Godfather prequel? What a great idea! What a pity they already made it; it's called the DeNiro segment of Godfather Part II. Still, everybody loves young people and origin stories, so let's start casting, shall we?

Of course, the most important decision is Vito Corleone. So we'll give you a choice: James Franco, Taylor Kitsch, or Josh Hartnett! Wheeee!

Moving right along to meaty Corleone enforcer Luca Brasi. How 'bout Jonah Hill?

Long-faced Sal Tessio? John Krasinski! With him, it's never business!

Loyal soldier Rocco Lampone? Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Look at the sardonic glint!

The scheming hothead Moe Green? Michael "Dangerous" Cera.

Patton Oswalt is just right for the saucy Peter Clemenza.

And finally, Vito needs a wife. How 'bout some Kate Beckinsale!

Just don't call it a reboot!

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Is this the Jewish Godfather we're going for? Jonah Hill as Luca Brasi? Jonah Hill is the least threatening man on earth. He's the very definition of Schlump.

Are there no virile Italian actors left around?

What about Danny Trejo as Willie Cicci? That ain't no heart attack!

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