- Dear Hipster:
- Why do some people hate pineapple on pizza so much?
- — Diane
I don’t know, but I can speculate. Personally, I think that Hawaiian burrito at JV’s Mexican is a straight-up delight, and that one pizza at Luigi’s (the one that I can never remember the name, but with the pineapple and jalapeños on it) is about as good as pizza gets. The weak answer to your question is, “Uhhhh, some people just like different things,” but I think people who make a big deal out of hating pineapple on pizza are just trying to be cool. It’s the same for those people who go out of their way to tell you they don’t like the Beatles, to which I’m, like, “Bully for you, broseph. Tell me again why I should care? You sleep better at night, knowing you let me know how right you are about pizza toppings?”
Either way, I found this picture of a Swedish pizza that has pineapple, shredded knockoff Spam, and (no shit) bananas on it. You know what I want to see now? I want to see some reader (could it be you?) roll up into their local pizza parlor, Spam and banana in hand, and request — nay, demand that the man behind the counter clone this beast of a pizza in the name of hipster science. Inquiring minds want to know.