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Perpetual motion machine of contemporary vanity

We aren't all masters of self-portraiture, but come on.

Benny Winfield Jr. — @MrPimpGoodGame

Dear Hipster:

I’ve noticed a lot of my friends post pretty much the same exact selfie over and over and over again on Facebook and Instagram. I don’t have a problem with selfies and stuff, but I do think it gets pretty dull when somebody can’t manage to switch it up, even a little. I think we need a word for that, so I can shame them with a suitable hashtag. What should it be?

— Evyn

This may be the digital society’s version of gauche table manners. I have friends who regularly commit this faux pas. There’s a reason I hide my personal Instagram and follow only a couple dozen. Too many “hot dogs or legs” posts out there, friends o’ mine.

We can’t all be masters of self-portraiture, capturing the nuances of human expression one duck face at a time. Heck, we can’t all be Benny Winfield Jr. (@MrPimpGoodGame), who has accrued 200,000+ followers by posting identical smiling selfies all day every day. Proving, at least, that some people still have a sense of humor.

Anyways, for our friends who lack Instagramspiration, perhaps #sisyphuselfies? I like portmanteaus, and there’s something correct about the fruitless labors of an endless parade of smiling faces saying nothing more than “Hey, here I am!” If only it weren’t such a mouthful.

I’m open to suggestions, or votes of confidence, to [email protected].

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