Like Chum in Shark Infested Waters......

I now know what it feels like to be chum in shark infested waters. A minnow amongst groupers, the last anchovy in a school of barracuda.......Yikes!

I can`t imagine being single anymore. I had forgotten what it is like out there in the old shark tank of life, and the agony my husband endures over this, fighting off the pawing hands of the overly indulged bar patron......Wow!

Now, I am not the hottest women in town, but, apparently as a group of friends, my husband and myself, entered unfamiliar territory, I was first drooled upon by "Indiana Jones" as he introduced himself.... To which my husband replied, * Nice to meet you, I`m Sweet Peas husband, Sponge Bob." At that point I could not hold my laughter, nearly showering my friends in a light spray of White Zinfandel.

Okay, so we have been at this particular place for 15 minutes, my husband walks off to sing a song, it`s karaoke night, and as he comes back to the table, I am again attracting one of the most unsavory characters, who appears to be beyond inebriated, cause my husband tells him to leave, and this guy is so blank you would think he had been at a Meg Ryan botox party earlier that day.

As this guy stands next to me trying to smile and tell me I am just "gregerous" , his words not mine........I tell him that someone wants him to sing and go pick out a song, his last words, "Ohh, uh yeah, uhh".....apparently they were taking request in the restroom, cause that's where he ended up.

Yeah, it`s not over folks.

Half hour into the evening, having a good time talking, a young Hispanic looking guy comes over and starts playing with my hair, and telling me, I am "bonita" over and over. And I reply "gracias", and "adios" to which he repeats, "bonita" again....and again. I say "Adios" smile and lightly turn him towards some poor girl that just walked in... I guess he wasnt interested, as he sat on a bar stool in the middle of the room and stared at me the rest of the night...but at least he wasnt touching me.

I realize my loving husband puts up with an awful lot. And if I say I will handle it he holds his temper............I appreciate that to the utmost, as I do not like fighting. Kinda kills the fun, and so far, knock on wood, if I have to confront an overly indulged person. I try to be nice and distract them. Make them lose mental balance, not too hard when they're toasted.

I just try not to chum the shark infested waters, and cause a frenzy at feeding time.................

I have to say, God bless my single girlfriends...........you are a group of brave women to go out there in the wild world.

And if you are ever faced with the same situation, Think what "Sponge Bob" and "Sweet Pea" would do!...................

Comments

Is that you in the Patrick Nagel inspired photograph? If so, you are gregerous...

  • Joe

Hello Joe...No, the pic is boredom at 3 o'clock in the morning inspired....I just won a new camera and tried it out. lol. And yes, it is me in the pic.

Thanks for the comment...I see you noticed the spelling...imagine how the mans enunciation was after what seemed like too many Buds. :)

I just call it...Living like a Rockstar! :)

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